Texas metaphor speak
Hello all,
Here’s another funny from my friend Don in Friday Harbor. Learn how to add color to your communications with these beauts from Texas…Enjoy…Dave
Texas Speak:
Handy as a pocket on a shirt.
Broke as the Ten Commandments.
If his brains were gunpowder he couldn’t blow his nose.
She could talk the legs off a chair.
She said that he’s all cattle and no prod.
He’s all hat and no cattle.
If that ain’t a fact, God’s a possum.
So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.
He’s so busy, you’d think he was twins.
He’ll squeeze a nickel till the buffalo craps.
It’s so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs.
Cold as a cast iron commode.
She’s two sandwiches short of a picnic.
She’s so ugly she has to sneek up on a glass of water to take a drink.
Confused as a goat on astro-turf.
Handy as hip pockets on a hog.
So ugly that his mama takes him everywhere she goes so she doesn’t have to kiss him goodbye.
Looks like he sorts bobcats for a living.
So buck-toothed that he could eat corn-on-the-cob through a picket fence.
If brains were leather, he couldn’t saddle a fly.