More Bumper Stickers!
Hello All,
Here’s another funny from Shirley in Los Angeles….Enjoy..Dave
BUMPER STICKERS………..
* Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
* Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
* Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
* I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
* I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
* I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
* I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
* I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy.
* If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
* Mental backup in progress - DO NOT DISTURB
* Mind like a steel trap - rusty, and illegal in 37 states.
* Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
* Support bacteria - they’re the only culture some people have.
* Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
* The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
* When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
* Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
* One-word sentences? Eliminate!
* Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
* The passive voice is to be eliminated.
* Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
* Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
* Who needs rhetorical questions?
Tags: Language